New Eyes. . .

Over the last couple of weeks God has opened my eyes  and broken my heart for people who don't know Him in a new way.  He showed me His heart by bringing to my attention several people who I know or have known closely who do not love Him or accept Him as their savior.  It just breaks my heart to see these friends, some of whom are like family to me, who grew up in Christian homes and went (or still go) to church and youth functions faithfully now rejecting the faith that they were raised in.  I was having a conversation with one of these friends a few days ago and it was just so heartbreaking.  They have the truth right in front of them and yet they can't or won't receive it.  The saddest part is the effect this rejection has upon a person's life.

Without God, life has no true meaning or purpose - something that I have seen evidenced in some of these friends as they have turned their backs on Him.  Their lives are hollow and they are searching for anything that is not God or religion that will fill the hole in their soul.  But they search in vain, because even if something seems to be working, eventually the emptiness with return.  Their lives are characterized by
a cycle of emptiness and hoplessness rooted deep within their souls and they search for anything or anyone that will fill that void.  After each new thing that they try they are consumed with guilt and self-loathing because they know that what they are doing is wrong but they are in bondage, unable to break free from their sinful patterns.

Self-hatred.
Depression.
Anxiety.
The search for fulfillment.
I have an intimate knowledge of all these things for I spent years of my life enslaved to this cycle as well.  I felt alone and empty and nothing helped.  I thought that a romantic relationship would give me fulfillment and happiness, but when it ended the emptiness and loneliness was just that much worse.  It wasn't until I gave up and in desperation turned to God and said if you are real, fix it that I found what I was looking for.  Because He did fix it.  He reached down and showed me how beautifully and absolutely real He is and that every single promise that He has ever made He will keep.  The minute I hit my knees and gave it up to Him, He filled that painful void in my soul.  Since that moment, even in my dark moments, I know that I am not alone.  Even when the world is dark, painful and scary and I am plagued by doubt, He is there ready to steady me and keep me from falling.

One of the most difficult and sad thing in life is that no matter how badly you want to, you can't make someone else experience this.  They have to reach their breaking point, the place where they have exhausted every option and are finally willing to surrender to God on their own.  Some people reach this point sooner, some later, and some never do.  As a human there is nothing that I can do to speed up the process or change someone's heart.  All I can do is watch and pray.  Pray for them to realize their need for God and do my best to show the love and light of Christ to them.  That is my prayer, for each and every one of the people God has placed in my life who don't know Him, that someday they will accept Jesus as their savior and join His family.